Imbas Kembali

Tadi telah diadakan sesi pembentangan oleh wakil Aman Palestin Berhad di dewan maktab. So, everything seems to be reminded once again, and I recalled whatever that I've known before.

Wakil tersebut membentangkan berkenaan sejarah asal Palestin secara ringkas, bagaimana Zionis ditubuhkan, dan Palestin dijajah dan dirampas oleh bangsa Yahudi. Tapi aku rasa kisha berkenaan sejarah Palestin ni terlalu banyak dan kompleks untuk diceritakan dalam masa beberapa jam sahaja. Perkaitan dengan banyak lagi peristiwa, termasuklah berkenaan Mustafa Kamal At-Tartuk tidak diceritakan langsung.

But then, everything urges us to go and read more about the details.

Happiest Day In Class

Fizik ada mengira!! Dan sangat seronok. Dah lama tak jumpa soalan geometri yang memeningkan kepala dan melibatkan vektor. Kalaulah sepanjang masa di sini boleh belajar matematik mesti akan jadi amat seronok.

At last, sesuatu yang mengaktifkan sel-sel dalam kepala aku.

p/s: pertama kali ada tag 'happy' daripada keseluruhan entri yang pernah aku tulis.

Berhujung Minggu Di Maktab

It has been some time since I last spent the weekend in maktab. Usual way is at home, with my parents, which at this moment, which is around 8 am, teasing my sleeping little sister so that she will get up. I'll pinch, or whisper, or scream, or pour lotion or draw pattern on her body with an eye liner until she got angry and cry. Hehe..

Well, morning is great! Especially on weekend. I realised that when I stopped sleeping after subuh, some months ago. Not many people around, the chirping sound of birds, a slow tune from someone's radio, the coolness of the air, the fogs at the nearby hills, everything is perfect. That is the advantages living far from town and not in a busy neighbourhood. If not what you'll hear is the rambling from the old folks gathering around gossiping. Hehe...

Emotional Disturbance

Gangguan emosi itu memang selalu berlaku. Selalunya sedih. Hari ini, dengan lebih tepat malam ini dan saat ini, perasaan itu lebih kepada kecewa. Entah apa yang aku harapkan hingga boleh jadi kecewa. Mungkin kerana selepas mendengar sebuah lagu yang...... mengenangkan dosa-dosa lama, dan seterusnya membayangkan masa depan yang mengecewakan. Ditambah lagi siang tadi semasa kelas, pensyarah bercerita berkenaan seorang bekas anak muridnya, yang kisahnya sedikit sebanyak meresahkan aku.

Hujung minggu ini, aku mengambil keputusan untuk tinggal di asrama. Aku nak bersendirian dan bersedih-sedih semahunya.

Oh, Master Holmes...

Another three series to finish. Why, I am too lazy to do all the tutorials and ISLs, but I filled up the time unusually by reading a book. My first attempt to read the 1408 pages of the whole collection was around two years ago when I bought the book. And then I stopped until the last end of year holiday. After four novels and two series from the collection, I think I need to reread them another time, because I seem to forget what the cases are. But maybe later. I want to read Shakespeare's next, which I believe that's the hardest since the language used is very old and my English is very limited.

Oh, I've become a book worm.

Siapa-siapa yang masih berada di UK, boleh tolong hadiahkan belikan Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets please...
American version sangat tidak seronok untuk dibaca.

Ibu -> Aku

Aku cemburu dengan beberapa orang kenalan dan sahabat yang sudah pun dan juga bakal menjadi ibu. Mudah dan murah rezeki mereka. Aku pula masih lagi belum ke peringkat yang pertama. Hingga saat ini, setelah enam tahun menanti, masih lagi menanti dan menguatkan kesabaran yang kadang hampir hilang.

Tapi hairan betul, macam mana ada seorang sahabat ini, masih lagi belajar di maktab perguruan, mengandung, dan diketahui ramai termasuklah dari golongan pensyarah, dan tidak diberi penangguhan setahun seperti yang telah diketahui umum? Adakah polisi di maktab perguruan ini ditentukan oleh budi bicara pensyarah dan golongan pentadbiran juga?
Sungguh memang dia dipermudahkan.

Hari ini aku akan ke majlis perkahwinan dua orang sahabat dari kecil yang sekarang sudah pun bergelar suami isteri.
Sebenarnya aku berat nak ke majlis perkahwinan. Aku rasa sangat sedih nanti, dan cerita lama pun bermain kembali. Seharusnya gembira, aku pula jadi tak tentu arah.

Tak adakah butang 'delete' dalam memori supaya aku boleh lupakan apa yang tak ingin aku ingat?

Expecting The Expected Unexpected

I am afraid of the future. Very much.

How will my life would be? Is it going to be very tough and stressful? Or, am I going to have a very linear life?

I hope it will be first. I want to have much challenge as I can take. That is the only reason for me to go out of my comfort zone, for me to be successful.

Sometimes, I do think that my life is ruined. I lost many of my chances, and the time is still ticking. I ruined my youth, my entire dignity. And now, I live as there is nothing happen.
Sometimes, I'm sick of myself.

First Day At School

Hehehe.. macam budak sekolah pula rasa. Anyway, this year I think might not be that bad. But I am so unfortunate (in the other hand, might be fortunate as well) to live separately with fellow classmates. Why did I say fortunate? I was told the 'unusual activity' at their block is far higher than this block which I am living now. So, that is the sole reason I guess. They can take care of me, but not at all time. Last time I can't sleep for about a week because I felt there was something watching me all the time after the incident.

So, today will be the second day. We are suppose to wear t-shirt today. Guess what, I can't remember when did I take out my t-shirts out of the bag. So I have none now; I'll borrow one from my roommate.
I heard last night that we will have class this Saturday and next Saturday to replace for Chinese New Year's holiday so it will be a week instead of just 2 days.

Bila nak jadi sibuk ni?