It Is 2.42 In The Morning

I can't sleep, I don't want to sleep. I am thinking about lots of things, lots of people, which occurred in my life, who come to my lonely life, and cheered me up, even I do feel annoyed sometimes. (jenis tak minat sangat nak berkawan, biasalah...)

And today, I miss them all. I miss all the things that we've shared before. I miss my small little room at the back of the house. I miss the chaotic life I've been struggled to get out this past 4 years.

Now I am in a very different world, different people, different group of people that lives are totally different from mine, different age group, different way of thinking, and.... everything!!

I need to fit in.

And truly, I miss the guy that is always with me, stay with me, tortured me with his cold responses and ignorance each time I skipped my classes, prayers, meals or when I did few crazy things, the guy that almost lost his life when I told him I don't need him anymore because I already have someone else that is much special than him, the one that accepted me back when I realize I did a very big mistake that led me to my darkest time in my life, the one that I believe is the best for me even others think he is nothing but a fat greedy guy who chase over my money.

We did bad things in our life, and when we think again about it, we regretted and wish, if we can turn back time, we will never do the mistakes.

The memories are very painful.

Dear friends, I am sorry I made you feel bad.