It is late. I know. I don't feel okay, my whole body hurts. Angin.
One improvement of me-self, I managed to tidy up my stuffs. Tengoklah sampai bila boleh kemas. Rasanya sempatlah sampai pagi esok. Ahh, bukan orang bujanglah namanya kalau bilik kemas. Kata rokers. Hehe..
One good news for me, my shipping boxes and luggage already arrived this night. I am soooooooo happy!! Jadi, Khamis ni balik rumah, buka kotak, kemas apa yang patut, angkut apa yang patut ke sini. Abang kata ' nanti balik dari cuti kena ambil (awok) dengan lori ek?' Well, last time, seat belakang penuh dengan barang aku sahaja.
Right, what to write eh?
This night, when I was ironing my clothes, I was thinking what Ye had said. She told me about appendix. Recently I got serious pain at my stomach, and I nearly fainted because of the pain. And she told me, when the appendix is at the serious stage, we might die when the 'pouch' burst. I don't have appendix (insyaAllah), but when she said the word 'die', I realised that I am now too far from God. I feel less fear, the feeling is the same as what I felt some years ago.
Reminders have been told, directly or not, but still, it seems there's no change. Orang kata, iman semakin nipis.
Kita di tahap yang bahaya bila kita rasa biasa dengan kemurkaan Allah, kita kurang rasa takut kepada Allah, kepada azab Allah. Tanda hati ada masalah.
I know the reason. But there are so much buts.
3.21 AM.
Selamat tidur. I am worry about me-self, inside out.
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