Menjejakkan Kaki Ke Alam 24 Tahun

I told Abah 'lepas ni boleh la kata dah nak masuk 24 tahun. hehe....', and he laughed. Well, today is my birthday, and I'm 23 today. Sudah tidak muda ye. Tak kisahlah. So as I got free minutes today, I called Mak twice, Abang and Wina!! Ohhhh..sangat rindu suara itu.

Thanks for the wishes.

No party ye. I'm not kind of celebrating things.

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Hari ni dapat tengok gambar kahwin Kak Aimi and Kak Zaza. Kak Zaza looks very different with the make-up. Apa-apa pun, tahniah. Kahwin Kak Aimi macam grand aje, siap ada Hijjaz buat show masa walimah. Anis pulak this weekend walimahnya.

Memang tak dapat nak pergi mana-mana walimah yang jauh. Sorry, tahap kesihatan dan stamina tidak mengizinkan.

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Tengah pening buat practical report. About rust, and alloy. Dan stuck pada theoretical knowledge. Maybe I should change the content, to something more brief. Dah beberapa hari pening dengan persamaan redox yang tak ingat langsung apa benda. Last time belajar chemistry was in school (di kolej selama seminggu tu tak kiralah ye). Even tentang rust pun tak ingat. Rujukan macam tak membantu pun.

Chemistry is never be my thing. Oh how I miss Maths so much.

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Kak Ima (kakak Abang) dah selamat operate (aku baru tahu tadi). Tak tahulah baby girl ke boy. Abang said the baby got heart problem, sebab tu kena bedah. Harap semuanya selamat. Mereka ada di Mentakab sekarang, sebelum Isyak tadi bertolak dari sini. Sampai-sampai, tak boleh melawat. Hampa jugalah katanya.

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Esok ada dinner. Kerja banyak tak siap. Dan aku pun sangat-sangatlah penat sekarang ni. Dah lama rasanya tak mengadap laptop dan buat kerja. Biasalah, main tangguh-tangguh ni seronok sebenarnya, buat seketikalah. Well, siksa pun seketika saja. Pandai-pandailah nak hidup.

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Duit

Well, allowance memang dapat untuk dua bulan je. Supposedly bersyukur, even received only 1/3 of the total amount. Again, a friend told me the next allowance will be deposited next year. And I hope the amount will be RM2000 + RM3000 ++, ie the real amount that should be received by us.

I got a call from Angah, telling me that my laptop can be repaired, but the payment is around RM800. So, I decided not to repair it, but buy a new one. Just hope Abah got some spare money to add up to mine.

Sini 99% of the work need to use laptop. Kalau di kolej dulu, IT lab buka sentiasa and free to be used unless ada kelas dalam lab tu. And printing is free, open at night until 11, internet pun okay. Dan kerja tak banyak yang perlu ditaip. Tapi itu private college. No wonder. No need to compare with the government's.

Tapi apa-apa pun masa tu dah berlalu. And I don't feel comfortable here. Tiba-tiba jadi macam budak kecil yang hari-hari merengek nak balik rumah. Oh, sungguh dekat dengan rumah jadi macam homesick setiap hari. Bukan ada apa pun di rumah sebenarnya. Actually rasa dah bosan hidup di asrama. Rasa macam budak sekolah. Agaknya macam tu kakak-kakak KPLI rasa.

Sungguh, kalaulah dibenarkan, aku nak sewa rumah di luar maktab. No ridicule rules to be followed (ada sesetengahnyalah), no dress code, boleh masak sendiri, even boleh susun jadual sendiri ikut suka hati.

Tapi apa-apa pun, semuanya kena kira duit juga. Nak survive semester ni pun tak tentu lagi. Entahlah. Sabar itu perlu, tapi kena cari jalan penyelesaian juga.

Life's not easy huh?

Hari Yang Sangat Memenatkan

Ooooohhhhh... sangat seronok sebenarnya. Kami jalan-jalan lagi. Last time ke Zoo Negara. Kali ni ke Lanchang pula, ke Deerland dan Kuala Gandah. Pada awalnya nak pergi hari Sabtu, tapi disebabkan aku pergi berubat jadi kereta tak dapat nak digunakan. Tapi pergi juga esoknya. Dan last minute, Abang nak ikut sekali jadi lagi ramai yang boleh pergi. Kami ke sana 3 kereta, adalah dalam 18 orang. Budak kecik yang ramainya. Kalau Pak Ndak ada, tambah satu lagi kereta.

Tapi kami tak sempat nak naik gajah. Tak apalah. Dapat pegang, tengok dekat-dekat, ambil gambar; dah cukup seronok. Balik saja dari sana, aku pun balik ke maktab. Terus tidur sampailah ke pagi.

Sayang tak bawa balik kamera.

Emppphhhh...

Kepala berat dari semalam. Dan badan sangat sakit.

Mak kata laptop dapat repair, dengan harga yang jauh lagi murah. So, selamat elaun aku. Hehe..

Tapi kerja tetap banyak. Dan harapnya minggu depan dapat tarikh untuk buat check-up.

Teringat dan Terluka

Ada satu connection between me and one of my ex. And that connection is a song, which he's the singer. Yes, he was a singer, a vocalist in a group to be exact. And that song, is famous again these few years. Well, it's a love song. And he sang to me several times before, and sometimes I got sentimental just meeting words that is similar to his group's name. Easily touched, just like that.

I hate this. It has been 3 years since we broke up. And last time I met him accidentally was last year. We just pretended to be friends. Plus my parents were there, his daughters were there. So.... just make the conversation simple and then parted.

I've been in a situation where my heart lies between two guys. Two times, and to make decision is hard. And I hate experiencing the same thing again and again.

Still got feeling for him? Nope, not much, I guess. I'm just feeling sentimental. Remembering the words he said to me, the songs he sang to me, the time he spent with me, the passion and interests that we shared.

It's just, sometimes we traced back what happened, and seems like we've been sucked into the past, and that's that. Nothing more. We got our own life now, we know the reason why the relationship failed, and then go on. Nothing should be regretted for. We have failed lots of time in life. This is one of it.

Frankly speaking, I have lots of failed relationships. Whether with families, boyfriends, friends. Lots and lots of times. One of my ex used to say, I can't change. I should. Because that keeps us together. But I never change. And I guess he can't stand that. I won't change, because what I am determines who I am.

I'm Not Homesick, I Just Want To Go Home

Mak dah pesan suruh balik rumah (sekarang ni tiap minggu Mak suruh balik kalau tak ada apa-apa program atau kelas ganti). Air tak ada, jadi berbaloi amat untuk balik ke rumah, dengan baju-baju kotor yang ada. Dan, being at home memang menyeronokkan. Yang tak menyeronokkan itu adalah bahagian untuk tunggu bas, naik bas, dan balik semula ke sini naik bas. Even bila sampai stesen sama ada di Raub atau Lipis akan ada orang ambil, still, aku tak suka nak bergerak banyak-banyak.

Sekarang ni, sambil-sambil buat PCK, aku belek-belek laptop ni. Selalunya orang guna laptop ni tapi tak jaga sangat. Anti-virus pun tak gerak. Sekarang aku tengah scan, dan touch up apa-apa yang patut. Bosan kot nak buat PCK ni. Well, buat apa-apa kerja memang membosankan.

Teringat semalam, buat mind map about behaviourist theories, ada sebut tentang kecenderungan. Seandainya kecenderungan untuk belajar (secara khususnya dalam konteks ini) hampir tiada atau memang tiada langsung, memang sesi pembelajaran tidak memberi kesan yang memuaskan.

Hehe...semalam mengomel, nak berhenti belajar. Ini, belajar secara rasmi ie attend class, buat homework, coursework, etc. Dan selalu kita alami, sesuatu yang kita baca sendiri berkenaan topik yang kita suka atau terlintas secara tidak langsung, lebih mudah untuk kita fahami daripada ke kelas dan belajar secara mendalam. Contohnya, ramai yang berminat tentang astronomi, apa yang ada di langit dan angkasa, tentang planet itu ini, objek-objek di angkasa, galaksi, lohong hitam dan macam-macam lagi. Tapi apabila kita belajar secara rasmi di kelas, minat tu jadi hilang, dan.... rasa tak bermakna langsung pembelajaran tu.

Jadi, andai rasa pembelajaran di kelas tak memberi apa-apa kesan kepada kita, malah menyusahkan, what if making light reading each day. Macam artikel contohnya. Bukan buku tebal atau nota-nota belajar yang not making sense tu.

Well, ini cadangan. Tapi ada juga benarnya.

Right?

Menanti

I did the check-up. The doctor said, he will arrange my appointment for further check-up, I believe is at Hospital Temerloh. Hearing that, I feel nothing. Not afraid at all, or worried much. I just don't want to be sick.

The doctor gave me a memo for exception of activities, but unfortunately is not accepted because it's not an official letter. But then, I checked what the doctor wrote on the memo; recurrent syncopal attack. This is what I found on the net. SYNCOPE

I pray, nothing serious will happen. See, emotional distress is one of the factors, other than the said physiological reasons.

Other than that, I'm waiting to go home. I want to meet everyone, I want to buy a new laptop. I'm now using Mak's. Just for this week. All the allowance that just being deposited, and my savings, will be use in a go.

Pokai la dalam 2-3 bulan ni.

Istighfar Banyak-Banyak

'Good news' no 1:

I left my handphone charger and the battery is out now. So, I have no means of communication. Well, not that I badly need it, but handphones are a necessity in a situation we never think of. But not a big problem at all. I can get the charger as soon as I go back this evening.

'Good news' no 2:

My laptop is broken. I can't turn it on at all!!

'Good news' no 3:

My lab report that is needed to be submitted tomorrow is in that laptop and I killed a lot of neurons in my brain for the whole day to do almost 85% of the report. And I HAVE TO REDO the typed words, plus the unfinished ones until 7 in the morning using Mak's laptop. Why until 7? Because she's going to KL to learn something about her internet business and of course she needs to bring her laptop with her. And I got roughly 4 hours to do the work. Great!! I already exhausted writing the report and find the information (even though I know my report is only explaining briefly), and I need to do it again?

'Good news' no 4:

The tutorials are in the laptop too which I need to submit God knows when. I don't know what the hell is going on with my laptop, and I don't know whether the memories can be survived or not, and all the work and notes are in that laptop.

I'm lost!!

I don't know. I'm totally lost. And I promised myself not to get too emotional. But I really need a kick to control myself. Oh, God. Please let me be calm. At least calm enough after I send the laptop to the service and know what really is going on. Well, it has been with me for about three years. It needs a break for a while. Just for a while.

Okay, break time over. Allow me to continue my work.
.
.
.
.
.

Weekend

I discussed with Abah, will do the check up later during weekdays, maybe on Monday or Tuesday. Because, we need a doctor to do the ECG and only the emergency department is open on weekend. So, that's for the first part.

The second one is, Angah is back. And he got 2 weeks of holiday before start working at Bentong. And he brought back lots of pearls. Haha... sekali tengok memang rambang mata. But deep inside, I felt guilty. Well, he brought lots of things for us, and others. But I never brought anything for them. Rasa macam.... teruknya aku ni.

Morale of the story: love your family no matter what. Even they don't tell you that they love you, or you lived far away from them since early age of your life, they still love you.

That is my mistake.

Extreme Thinking

I have lots of negative thoughts in mind. And I love to express the thoughts especially when I'm not okay, in vain, angry and other kind of negative feelings.

Yesterday, before she went back, Ija said these words to me 'jangan buat benda-benda pelik.'

No, you wont find any dead body in here, at least in here.

TAPI.....

I almost fainted yesterday while playing netball. As Puan Puziah said 'pucat sangat dah muka, biru-biru', and at the same time I felt my heart like to explode. I felt a mild pain, but something crossed my mind; heart failure.

I am afraid of dying. Well, who doesn't? But when I am not okay, I am pleasure-ly want to die. But when facing death, I am afraid. It made me feel stupid. So much.

Morale of the story; control the feeling. Even if we find it hard, try. Don't think about something bad. I have dreams, I want to live and get married and have children. I want to raise them to be good people, good Muslims, for Islam. And I have to correct myself for them. I have to be strong. I have to be positive. And I don't want to die when they really need me to be with them.

Tunggu ibu ye sayang....

Words, Don't Come Easy To Me

Kadang-kadang tu, hanya satu perkataan mampu buat kita gembira.

Thank you (^_^)

Semut, Air, dan Apa-Apa Yang Berkaitan

Rimas dengan semut. Air tak boleh tinggal terbuka. Mesti kena hurung dengan semut. Tak faham betul aku dengan semut ni. Itu baru air, belum lagi benda-benda lain. Dan semalam aku baru perasan, salah satu buku aku dah jadi tempat pembiakan semut. Teringin sekali membakar mereka beramai-ramai. Macam mass massacre. Muahahahahahahahahaha...

Pasal kes air, well known memang maktab ni SENTIASA bermasalah air. Aku yang jenis tak minat balik rumah ni pun dah jadi rajin balik rumah. Mengeratkan ukhuwah betul si air ni.

Sleepy

Not happy. Got something to this evening, and got class at night. Bila masanya nak berpoya-poya?

Nak berenti belajar. Nak kerja.

Oh hidup!

Well, kerja tak bermaksud boleh berpoya-poya jugak. Tanggungjawab bertambah.

Kenapa ye, parents ramai yang tak beri anak-anak kahwin masa belajar dengan alasan tak boleh nak bahagi masa antara keluarga dan belajar. TAPI masa dah kerja nanti, benda yang sama juga berlaku, dan lebih besar bebanannya.

Itu dari segi tanggungjawab.

Tapi alasan berkenaan kematangan itu, boleh diterima.

Kalau alasan sebab pemalas, anak dara tapi perangai macam anak jantan. Bangun tengah hari, masak malas, kemas rumah malas, mandi malas, melepak aje kejenya sampai pagi buta; mana nak jadi bini orang?

Hehehe... memang hidup leisurely.

Another Series of Mumbling

I'm in stress. And I am doing my homework. Really, this maktab changed me a lot. From someone who don't really care about studying, almost never do the homework, skipping class almost everyday (my record : go to class for less than a month in one semester, but I bet I can't beat Adam ;b), break laws, headbanging all the time in the room until 3 in the morning. Really, I changed a lot. Well, I got a very nice room-mate; that's the only reason I have though.

But I'm having fun studying in here. The level is not as high as before, and I'm not really striving in getting high mark, because I know I can pass even though I don't really try my best. But the pressure is still there. Pressure is everywhere. And it fuels us, to do the job, to work. But I hate pressure. I like to live leisurely, in my comfort zone, sticking out a foot a bit if necessary. That's, what I'm doing right now.

I'm still cannot sleep, even I feel really tired. A bit frustating, when I can't find the reference I need. Library is of course out of reach at 1 AM. There are not many articles and journals regarding education in Malaysia, and if there is any, we need to purchase, which I automatically say no. So, I'm stuck.

Recently, I noticed I started to swear. Easily gets angry, and feels like to kick or punch something. Ohhhoooo... not good, not good.

I Feel Different

The mood is different. Each day. Not like the first semester. This mood reminds me about my life in college. One of the best days in my life, and the worst too. I feel great, at the same time aware of the consequences, some time ahead.

Semoga masih ada malu yang bersisa.

Update:
I don't know how long can I keep up being like this. It's bursting like hell. And ever since that first moment I felt different, I'm losing the things I treasured most. Oh God, help me.

I've trained myself not to depend on something else, but I failed. This is because all my life is devoted to that something, from the beginning. And I failed to carve this in my heart and soul; nothing is eternal except Allah. Lots of us know that but never shown in all our deeds.

I don't know whether I'm regretting, frustating or simply blown out. Like, life's gonna be like it used to be. Everything is in disaster.

I know I wrote this at the surface only and people would say 'what the hell is she talking about!!?'.

Who cares!!??

I Want To Write

Semalam pulang dengan badan yang letih. Last minute baru makan, dan seperti biasa, tiap kali balik ke sini mesti at least dua kali angkat barang. Well, itu belum lagi bila dah ada kereta nanti. Ada juga discuss dengan Abah, but then tak tahu bila boleh dapat. Duit pun kena kumpul juga. Frankly speaking, I want his Iswara. And I don't want Kancil. Sangat kecil dan I don't think my things will fit in it.

So, each day wondering about getting a car, getting married, get children, finishing study, go to work, have a small house at kampung, bela ayam itik tanam sayur. Benda-benda yang nampak macam leisure. Hehe...

Berangan sajalah buat masa sekarang. And work towards that. When the time comes, everything will be in place. Not exactly as what I dreamt, but at least have something.

I think a lot recently. The same thing as I thought a year ago. Deciding who I want to be. I am torn actually.

The Last Wedding

That, is for Pak Ngah. He's the last in the his line. The second walimah was yesterday. I was not doing much work, just help a bit preparing food for the wedding couple. But since there were lots of havoc and noise from the people and the karaoke-ing, I dare not to stay there too long. Two days of working and everyone was sleeping there except me. I can't go along with my cousins and aunties. That's the first reason though.



So, this is one of the photos from yesterday. My new Mak Ngah is quite beautiful though. I'm surprise she is actually 48, just 2 years younger than Pak Ngah.

Anyway, that's that. Now I need to continue my own work. There are lots to be submitted early next week. So, ganbatte!!

P/S : Anyway, I got myself a radio, at last! I've been dreaming for about a year of having one replacing my old one which I left at Cardiff. Well, the colour and shape is about the same as the old one. Seems that I got my baby back. Hehe...

Love What You Have Right Now

In this one year, I rethink lots and lots of time. Betul ke aku ni nak jadi macam ni? I mean, pakai tudung labuh, act like a good girl, rajin-rajin mengaji, cuba tak tinggal solat. But the thing is, memang banyak kali juga kalah, banyak kali juga kembali ke perangai asal. Sangat susah nak berubah. Sangat susah nak maintain. And my heart kept saying, you are hypocrite dude!! You don't even act as what you said you are supposed to be. You tend to act as you want you to be, as what you like. And look, each second passed with you committing sins with you realising it is a sin. And you don't really feel guilty about that. Still like before. You are still heartless like before.

Frankly speaking, aku rasa goyah sangat. I said to myself, kenapa susah sangat nak jadi baik? Kenapa suasana macam tak membantu? Kenapa lagi senang jadi macam dulu dan tak perlu nak pening-pening nak jaga semua benda?
But as I kept asking why and why, I already knew the answer. Not the schema answer, but the answer I know by heart and mind, is true.

Masalahnya pada jiwa. Jiwa aku.

I pray to you Allah, help me to be stronger. Bantu aku supaya aku tak jadi sampah semula.

Beauty

Baru tadi dapat invitation dari seorang kawan, yang rasanya dah pun kahwin. Mungkin untuk walimah saja kot. Anyway, her husband sangat-sangat sepadan. Pengantin perempuannya kurus tinggi dan putih. Si lelaki pun sama, macam orang Arab. Memang sangat cantiklah.

Kata berkenaan cantik ni, sesungguhnya hanya luaran saja. Tapi penting juga kan? Kalau si suami senang tengok wajah si isterinya, ditambah dengan tingkahlaku, layanan etc, bertambah bahagialah rumah tangga tu.

Bukan nak mengata, tapi sesetengah orang lelaki ni pandang rupa nombor satu, lagi-lagi yang dah pun kahwin. As I observed among my friends yang around 30 - 40 years old, memang pantang tengok perempuan cun. Tambah lagi kalau perempuan tu muda, bergaya dan sedikit seksi. Siapa tak suka kan? Tapi bila kita si perempuan yang melihatnya, geram juga. Yalah, kesian si isteri. Masa sebelum kahwin dulu beria-ia. Kalau betul suka perempuan yang cun melecun, pandai-pandailah jaga si isteri bagi cun sentiasa. Belikan jamu ke, hantar ke spa, alat-alat untuk kuruskan badan, bagi pada isteri. Itu baru betul. Untuk apa nak kagumi wanita yang pastinya takkan jadi milik kita, tapi abaikan wanita yang memang milik kita.

Some other guys used to tell me this, bila dah ada anak, isteri dah tak macam dulu. Lebih melayan anak, kadang penampilan tak jaga. Kadang-kadang malu nak bermanja-manja macam baru kahwin dulu, sebab segan pada anak. Suami ni, kenalah dilayan. Dah tanggungjawab isteri. Bila suami mula menggatal, marah pula.

Quoting from somewhere, kahwin ni bukan hanya untuk suka-suka saja. Jangan fikir untuk malam pertama saja, tapi fikirlah sampai ke lampin anak sekali. Means, tanggungjawab itu yang utama. Kena biasakan multitasking dari sekarang. Kalau tak, nanti bila dah beranak pinak, kelam kabut jadinya. That one part memang aku fail sungguh. Maybe I really need a maid nanti.

Anyway, tahniah pada kawan-kawan yang nak kahwin ni. Mungkin tak datang pada mana-mana walimah yang ada kecuali yang berdekatan dalam jarak masa 2 -3 jam, sebab masalah duit dan masa juga kesihatan yang tak menentu sekarang ni.

Family

Last Sunday, masa ke pasar malam di bandar baru, terserempak dengan Eda dan semua adik beradik dia, kecuali Apik. I was with Abang at that time. And Adik Mi and Pak Teh memang suka menyakat kami. Well, we've been together for 5 - 6 years, mereka membesar pun tengok kami saja but masih tak kahwin-kahwin. Maybe they already assume me as their 'mak jang'. But then, I was invited to join them makan-makan at Pahang Club, together with their parents. Last time, I was invited celebrating their mother's birthday. Actually datang rumah diaorang secara kebetulan saja. Selalunya singgah sebab nak tumpang solat, plus Eda tu member dari sekolah dulu dan satu geng. But I feel welcomed, and at the same time feel funny. Having another family is like.... weird and uncomfortable.

Dulu, baik-baik dengan Eda pun sebab rumah dia sangat dekat dengan sekolah. And menumpang rumah dia dulu pun sebab nak date dengan Tompey (my ex bf). Mak aku memang marah aku menumpang rumah orang ni. Me and her parents were sort of biasa-biasa je. But I noticed that her dad was more talkative and friendly before. Maybe after some years, and I changed a lot, plus dah besar panjang dan tak macam budak-budak dah, rasa macam ada gap.

I do realise that, even with other guys. My friends, my uncles, sepupu, adik lelaki aku. And maybe dengan Abah juga kot. Tapi apa-apa pun, they are family. Dan aku cubalah untuk join diaorang, tapi tengok event jugalah. Kalau nak ajak merendet layan karaoke tu, takpelah, aku tolak awal-awal. Sorang pak sedara aku ni rajin sangat ngajak aku pegi karaoke. Beramai-ramailah.

Kadang tu, susah nak tune diaorang ni. Zaman aku purely rokers dah berlalu. Bukan apa, kalau aku fikir nak jadi rokers balik, at the same time aku fikir nak cabut tudung, jadi perokok tegar semula, tindik sana sini, all sorts of things. Aku tak nak kembali pada zaman aku tak kisah dosa pahala. Walau aku tahu, zaman tu memang syok.

So, that is why I consider not to be attached too much with someone or something. I can't. I easily become fanatic. Even with family.

Pak Ngah Kahwin

Aku sepatutnya ada usrah petang ni. Badan dan kepala berat.

Anyway, ada tutorial yang perlu dihantar esok. Kepala makin sakit. But have to get up. Sambil-sambil tu, teringat gambar-gambar kahwin Pak Ngah yang aku tak tengok betul-betul lagi. Jadi tadi aku tengoklah. Kebanyakannya gambar budak-budak ni (sepupu-sepupu dan adik-adik aku). Diaorang pula yang sibuk nak bergambar. Patutnya ambil la gambar pengantin. Dan gambar yang diaorang ambil tak cantik sangat. Bukan sebab camera, tapi jenis tak pandai cari angle. Flash pun keterlaluan.

Rasa macam rugi tak dapat ikut last Saturday. He is my last uncle yang tak kahwin lagi. And he's already 50 years old. Supposed to be a moment to be celebrated the most. Just hope this Saturday aku tak busy sangat so that boleh jadi photographer sepenuh masa. And semoga badan sihat. Itu yang paling penting.



Ini gambar terbaik yang ada kot. Yang baju biru tu Bear, adik aku. Dan gambar ni diambil guna phone dia. So, tu la pasangan pengantin. Semoga berbahagia ke akhir hayat. Banyak halangan diaorang berdua ni. Sepatutnya kahwin masa cuti sekolah lepas tapi sebab banyak halangannya, tangguhlah sampai 3 minggu.

Well, saya dah ada mak sedara baru :D

New Semester

Well, semester dua dah mula Isnin baru ni. First day in class dah belajar. Masa tu jadual pun belum diedarkan, masih ada pada ketua unit lagi. Tapi tak mengapalah, dah lepas dah pun. Dan kerja pun bertimbun. And next week sudah ada experiment. I don't know what kind of experiment can be done with kebuk wasap yang tak berfungsi, bahan-bahan kimia yang rasanya macam tak ada aje. As the first batch of science doing degree in this maktab, memang banyak barang yang tak ada. And experiments are compulsory for the total marks of each semester yang contribute for the whole pointer at the end of the degree program nanti. Just wait and see.

Most of my friends who were studying with me in UK dah mula balik. Masing-masing dah dapat degree. Good for them. For students under sponsor of Kementerian Pelajaran will continue for another year buat KPLI di maktab pula. Diaorang balik tengah bulan ni dan mula belajar KPLI this coming August. Sekejap sajalah berehatnya.

Aku dah mula dapat sesuaikan diri sikit di maktab ni. Semester dulu memang hectic dan meruntun hati. Banyak kali juga depress sebab cara belajar di sini memang jauh berbeza dengan di UK dulu. Dan hostel aku sangat selalu tak ada air. Seminggu ada, seminggu kemudian tak ada, dan berulang-ulang selama beberapa bulan. Mujur juga rumah dekat, jadi kalau boleh balik tu memang aku akan balik. Harap dapat nak kumpul duit beli kereta, mudah nak ke mana-mana. Transportation di sini pun tak ada. Budak-budak ni selalunya guna prebet sapu, or taxi. Mahal sangat. 5 minit saja kalau nak ke bandar pun. Cost RM12 per car, or taxi. Macam tak berbaloi. Kalau yang ada kenderaan sendiri tu okaylah. Senang.

For me, aku naik bas saja. Tapi penat sangat. Kena jalan ke pagar dalam 1-2 km dulu. Bus pun jarang-jarang ada. Bas yang selalu aku naik jam 3.30 petang. Bas sebelum tu dalam jam 1.30, dan selepas tu dalam jam 6. So, memang susahlah.

Semester ni is expected to be more crazier than last semester. I just hope cepat-cepatlah 4 tahun ni berlalu. Aku dah malas dah nak belajar ni.