Family

Last Sunday, masa ke pasar malam di bandar baru, terserempak dengan Eda dan semua adik beradik dia, kecuali Apik. I was with Abang at that time. And Adik Mi and Pak Teh memang suka menyakat kami. Well, we've been together for 5 - 6 years, mereka membesar pun tengok kami saja but masih tak kahwin-kahwin. Maybe they already assume me as their 'mak jang'. But then, I was invited to join them makan-makan at Pahang Club, together with their parents. Last time, I was invited celebrating their mother's birthday. Actually datang rumah diaorang secara kebetulan saja. Selalunya singgah sebab nak tumpang solat, plus Eda tu member dari sekolah dulu dan satu geng. But I feel welcomed, and at the same time feel funny. Having another family is like.... weird and uncomfortable.

Dulu, baik-baik dengan Eda pun sebab rumah dia sangat dekat dengan sekolah. And menumpang rumah dia dulu pun sebab nak date dengan Tompey (my ex bf). Mak aku memang marah aku menumpang rumah orang ni. Me and her parents were sort of biasa-biasa je. But I noticed that her dad was more talkative and friendly before. Maybe after some years, and I changed a lot, plus dah besar panjang dan tak macam budak-budak dah, rasa macam ada gap.

I do realise that, even with other guys. My friends, my uncles, sepupu, adik lelaki aku. And maybe dengan Abah juga kot. Tapi apa-apa pun, they are family. Dan aku cubalah untuk join diaorang, tapi tengok event jugalah. Kalau nak ajak merendet layan karaoke tu, takpelah, aku tolak awal-awal. Sorang pak sedara aku ni rajin sangat ngajak aku pegi karaoke. Beramai-ramailah.

Kadang tu, susah nak tune diaorang ni. Zaman aku purely rokers dah berlalu. Bukan apa, kalau aku fikir nak jadi rokers balik, at the same time aku fikir nak cabut tudung, jadi perokok tegar semula, tindik sana sini, all sorts of things. Aku tak nak kembali pada zaman aku tak kisah dosa pahala. Walau aku tahu, zaman tu memang syok.

So, that is why I consider not to be attached too much with someone or something. I can't. I easily become fanatic. Even with family.